Bob's Flobs

A Case Study in Dating Standards

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Bob's Non-Negotiables

The Dumbass Manifesto

  1. Nobody younger than daughter
  2. No married women (dangerous!)
  3. No smokers (dislike the taste)
  4. Demand an IQ - minimum 3x bra size
  5. Must be able to wrap arms around
  6. Mustache must not exceed size or quality of mine
Bob's Note: 1-5 exceptions have been made - intentional OR unintentional. Never for number 6.
VS
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Anti-Bob Non-Negotiables

The Beautiful Woman's Response

  1. Vasectomy
  2. Sense of Humor
  3. Drinks (not excessive/no coins/sober roller)
  4. Challenges Intellectually (no fucktards)
  5. Mom Approval (Tina won't kill him)
  6. Ally
Reality Check: Notice how one list is about control and superficial metrics, while the other is about compatibility and actual human qualities.